Back from Africa for nearly five weeks but i still feel like i'm not "all here", that i don't really fit inside my skin. So much of my self remains in the places i visited, with the people i came to know and love, and each day i find myself wondering how Beatrice is recovering from the death of her 8-year-old granddaughter from AIDS... how Juliana's grandchildren are doing since her death from complications of AIDS...how the businesses of the grandmothers in Mwanza are doing... how the uniforms for the grand-children in the Kibera pre-school are coming along. I have more "grandchildren" now, more than my wonderful nine grand grands here in North Carolina...and my heart is both filled to overflowing with the courage and hope and broken open with the pain and poverty i witnessed firsthand.
And i am left with so many questions: How do i best live out my caring and concern? How do i let these new friends know that my thoughts and prayers are with them daily, that i send blessing each time i recall their dear faces? How do i live faithfully and responsibly in this place at this time in my life, knowing that i am deeply connected with these sisters far across the world? And how do i find my way back to this incredibly beautiful and terrible place which has implanted its mark like an indelible tattoo on the deepest place inside me.
