Here I sit at 3a.m., having just eaten a small "breakfast", after more than eight hours of sleep. My body remains on Kenya time- fell asleep at 4:30p.m. yesterday and awoke at 9:30a.m.-in Kenya! I guess this is what is known as "jet lag", though it simply feels like needing to reset my body clock, which has spent nearly four weeks on another schedule of life. Guess they're one and the same thing...though I see it as my body letting me know that my biological clock isn't reset nearly as easily as my wristwatch. And I'm paying attention. In the meantime, I'm trying to use these early-morning hours for something constructive...catching up on emails and this blog...doing laundry...and watching the very early news on ABC.
So, my body is in agreement with my mind and heart. Part of me is still in Kenya, firmly held by the grandmothers and grandchildren I met...by both the beauty and the poverty...by both the hospitality and the need...by the inability to claim and explain the emotions which threaten to overflow each time I think about the past four weeks. I look the same...my outward appearance has not changed...but inside, I am in turmoil...in the sense that I feel a pull to return, though in what capacity I am uncertain. Too soon, I realize, to have any clarity...it's just that these dark, early-morning hours lend themselves to such reflection...and suddenly I find I am getting very sleepy. "To sleep...perchance to dream..." Good night...good morning.
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